Peaches

Umm, apparently shopping days will be days of blogging inspiration from now on. I bought some basic groceries today, peaches, eggs, solution, etc. While selecting peaches, it came to my mind that I have started to eat unbelievable amounts of peaches as of late, almost as if I was addicted. Thinking about it, my mind slipped to some other addictions of mine. My grandfather used to say that habits (and addictions were sort of implied) are a man's worst enemy. I assume he meant a woman's, too.

So, following is a not so short list of my addictions.

1. Well, I do have to start with the inspirational fruits - peaches. I've always been a sucker for fruits, almost all types. Recently though I've been buying, and eating, almost disagreeable amounts of peaches. I love them. I must be eating about 3 or 4 a day, everyday. I'd eat more but I can do only so much. A friend was showing me once a book with all sorts of fruits and veggies that were lost in humanity's battle with nature. I wonder what types of peaches I have missed for being born in these times of victory.

2. Yeah, cigarettes. I've been smoking on and off for half of my life now, embarrassing as it is. I have pretty much minimized smoking without completely quitting. Which is amazingly stupid and deserves my uttermost contempt. I do smoke when I'm drinking and I do smoke a lot when I'm drinking, it's almost chain-smoking. I also smoke when I'm driving long distance alone. It pleasures me. I don't smoke at all otherwise. That's my compromise and it's pathetic.

3. The Internet. Well, not the Internet at large. I'm no good at browsing because I don't have the patience to follow a line. But I am addicted to web sites. First of all comes my Google home page, with my gmail account and all the news sources I am interested to follow. They include a bunch of geek (but not extra-geek) web sites such as CNet News, Slashdot, Techdirt, Wired News, and the awesome Google Earth Hacks... Also, news websites, such as Google News, BBC News, Forbes News, etc. And some fun shit, like Quotes of the Day... I recently got addicted to YouTube.com, and more particularly, a video blog of a person calling himself boh3m3. He's quite a character but he's also smart and amusing, of sorts. And, yeah, myspace.com... Myspace does not deserve much of a commentary though.

4. Solitude. I used to think of it as loneliness until I remembered there's a way better word for it - solitude (and that reminded me of one of my all time favorite books, One Hundred Years of Solitude, a book I grew old reading). How did that come to happen I don't know. I sort of remember when I started choosing to be alone, to drive somewhere by myself, to go for a walk, run, to the gym, by myself. To just stay home, by myself. There was a very well defined period of time about a year ago when I devoted myself to waiting, hoping beyond hope, ugh! And waiting, it is a lonely activity, it was for me anyhow. Man, I wish I hadn't done it. Anyway, when I finally realized it was nothing I was waiting for, it turned out I didn't want people around anymore. Totally focused on myself, licking my wounds (do you happen to have this expression here?), I didn't want other people. In a while I was done feeling sorry for myself but I realized I didn't necessarily need people anymore. Sure, I need to hang with people from time to time but the personal time and space I need barely allow me to pay attention to anyone else. Damn.

5. Nine Inch Nails... Oh well, that is something that everyone that has met me, even briefly, in the last couple of months, knows. I'm not sure if it's addiction or obsession. Fact is, I cannot listen to anything else ever since I went to this concert. A friend shared it takes about a year to recover. Man, I don't know. I'm sort of trying to unhook because I don't want to end up hating the band and feeling sick of the music. But it is not only the music that I like. At some point I started understanding what the guy is singing about and it's painful how much I can relate to it. Amazingly enough, Nine Inch Nails energizes me like the freaking bunny batteries, what was the brand? I feel like flying when I listen to that music.

6. Strange and stranger than strange experiences. Well, that's a funny and interesting one, too. The way I see myself, I am an ordinary and normally boring person awarded with a very interesting life. The truth is, I have never been prone to planning in my personal life, I've been floating, following the flow. The few times I've taken decisions, they related to building some sort of principles and/or values to protect myself from some currents and waves that might smash me against the rocky bottom and break my neck. But the flow has taken me to strange places, met me with extremely interesting people... I have become addicted to interesting, talented, smart, and charismatic people. I fully realize they might be such only in my eyes. But isn't perception all?

7. Finally... I guess I could come up with a bunch of other things but I don't have to bare it all, right? Finally, apparently, I am totally addicted, obsessed and in love with myself. I cannot see anything further than the tip of my nose. Or the peach in my hand.

My brain has turned to a peach.